| you know what... this whole last post thing wasnt really working for me. i really feel like i didnt express what i really wanted to say... so here i am giving it a second try. after consulting "master yoda", i now realize that those three girls: ruth, kim, and lorie... really didnt mean that much to me. i mean ya... i had a little thing for them here and there but ultimately in the end... i really dont think it wouldve lasted. meaning that the juice probably wasnt worth the squeeze. on the other hand, there was you, Kat. i could go on and on talking about what we did, about how much everything we did made me so happy, and all that crap but i really dont think it matters to anyone else, but me. im going to be upfront with you kat. i pictured myself being with you for a long time. i felt that me and you connected on a level that i could not connect with anyone else. there was something special about you that just had me. you were the type of girl i was looking for, someone who i could be myself with, and someone who i could be happy with. but i dunno... somewhere along the road i guess signs were misread or were interpreted the wrong way. maybe, most likely all on my part. maybe you just wanted to be friends from day one, and i thought that you wanted to be more... but i know in the end, im happy that we're still friends. all i want out of this is something that i never really had with those other pieces of work; closure. i really just want to have closure to this all... i dont care if u dont like me or anything like that cuz im still happy being you friend. you never did anything wrong to me... i guess if making me happy was a crime, then you'd be guilty. you know what i think when i see you though? i dont think about the kathleen that i saw at mrs. sandoval-tran's wedding, no. i think about the cute, sweet girl who was somewhat shy and who just had an awesome personality, that i met way back at the key club OTC... but now... all that stuff that happened in high school is behind me. it has to be... otherwise i will miss out on what the world out there has to offer. i really hope you read this or at least have one of your friends tell you to read it or something. on the other hand, theres the 3 drones: kim, lorie, and ruth. haha man...
ruth- let me start off with you. girl, you need to get your act together. otherwise, your gonna find yourself at the point of no return. ive heard about all that stuff you been doing and honestly, that shits just nasty. now i dont know if its true or not but seriously, if it is, cut it out. you need to get ur life together and need to find out what other things the world out there has to offer. open your damn eyes and see that you have family and friends that love you and that you dont need to be doing that fucking shit. but if u dont wanna listen, ah fucking well!! its ur life... if u wanna ruin it... go for it!
kim- haha man fuck this... i really think ur a tease... and believe me... im not the only one. i dont know if u were PLAYING dumb or u just REALLY couldnt see that i liked you... haha man... what a waste of time and my life. i had a friend say "i once made a shirt with nothing but T's on it" haha and i found that funny... and guess who the first person that popped in my mind was when i heard it... you guessed right!! YOU!!! haha.. best of luck to you, DOUBLE H!
lorie- seriously, get away from the drama and all that shit...haha i really think ur in with the wrong crowd, but hey, if u call them "friends" then go ahead... ur old enough to make ur own decisions... i dunno...you had potential, until something happened, i dunno maybe a desire to fit in???... haha i dunno... whatever.
ALL THREE OF YOU ARE DRONES! really consider my advice... it might change people's outlook on you... but if u dont care what people think... haha then let it be... cuz i certainly dont give a shit. anyways, PEACE OUT! |
